The Chocolate War

When you're alone and no one will know..do you eat that last piece of delicious chocolate cake? It's calling you by name and saying, "Eat Me!"

While having my morning cup of coffee today, I heard a faint voice. Intriguing, it was almost child-like and coming from the refrigerator. Befuddled, I rose from the chair and opened the fridge door. The voice was now clearer and I did not have to strain to hear it. "Krissy, eat me." The alluring voice was coming from the 10 inch square, white cake box.

I looked around to make certain I was alone, even though I knew I was [alone.] I took the box and placed it on the kitchen table. Turning and opening the cutlery drawer, I got myself a fork. I slowly opened the top of the box and stared at the beautiful 7 layer, chocolate cake. It's moist layers were filled  with creamy chocolate ganache and it was iced with Southern Chocolate Fudge Icing.

Oh, my! Writing this blog is making me salivate!

For a few seconds I debated whether or not to have a piece. Should I? Shouldn't I? How silly it felt to talk to myself. Looney Tunes! Finally, I actually rationalized why I SHOULD have a piece! Since I had not had any breakfast, would it not make sense to have something to eat now? This one piece of cake would be my morning meal! I mean, I needed to eat something..why not the cake? Using the side of my fork, it was easy to cut a good size piece and pull it away from the whole. It was an amazing sight. Each layer was the same width as all the others, and even though the piece I had cut with the fork had fallen sideways, the layers were rich enough to stay bonded to each other. What the hell are you doing, Krissy?! I shouted inside my head. I pulled my hand out of the box. I stared at the piece I had cut. I wondered how many steps I would have to climb, to burn off all the calories of that one piece of "YUM!" I couldn't do it. I shut the box quickly and with one swift swoop, the cake box was in the garbage receptacle. I was proud of myself! Even though, I really, really, wanted a piece (or two or three), I was able to say "No" to my inner child-like voice. Hey! You can't always get what you want! 

As I tidied up the kitchen, I was very aware of the cake box that lay silent in the garbage. Suddenly, I remembered, George Costanza and the eclair episode of Seinfeld. How low could one get? Would I remove something from the garbage, and eat it?!! Could I?! Would I?! I refused to become George! I walked over to the receptacle, opened it, and placed my sneaker-ed foot on to the box. I smashed the hell out of it!! I twisted my foot, reaching all the corners of the white box.. so as to not leave ANY resemblance to what was known previously as chocolaty deliciousness !! What was once a cake "to die for" was now in smithereens!

When I shared my situation with my Facebook family, a little while later, most were proud of me! The best advice came from another TV show, about a similar situation. To be absolutely sure that you will NOT weaken, grab a spoon and eat the crumbled cake that still remains in the otherwise clean (but tossed) box, do this:  Take your liquid dish soap and pour it on top of your cake/eclairs/cookies. This way, you will think twice about salvaging anything that has been tossed in with the garbage!!

A little note for you chocolate lovers..oops! I meant..trivia lovers..Marie Antoinette was NOT the one who said, "Let them eat cake." Referring to the peasants who had no bread to eat, it was written by a French philospher named Jean Jacque Rousseau.                   Peace.

This post is contributed by a community member. The views expressed in this blog are those of the author and do not necessarily reflect those of Patch Media Corporation. Everyone is welcome to submit a post to Patch. If you'd like to post a blog, go here to get started.

A Pietro June 29, 2012 at 07:55 PM
Once again you had me laughing! I have done the same but sometimes the cake is calling my husbands name.


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