Apocalypse 101

The Mayan calendar, in the ultimate homage to Montezuma's Revenge, passes into eternity in 2012. December 21, 2012, to be exact. The winter solstice. It is then, according to 2012 theorists, that the world shall meet an apocalyptic fate. [Assuming anyone could spell  a·poca·lypti·c, or actually knew what it meant!] Witness the many books, movies, and entrepreneurial merchandising efforts attempting to capitalize on the 2012 version of Y2K. The coming of the Apocalypse.

Calendars, and the prophesies that flow from them, often foreshadow events, much like Nostradamus' prophesies are said to have foretold events for centuries beyond his life -- at least in hindsight. [Of course, had Nostradamus really been able to forecast the future, he would have loaded up on Apple and Google stock! What did he know?]

The Jewish calendar, for instance, recognizes an "end of days" of sorts, which is said shall follow the 8 days of eating matzoh and matzoh by-products, whereupon a cataclysmic explosion shall occur.

Then there's the Gregorian or Christian calendar, which predicts, if not the end of the world, then certainly, the end of money, each year on April 15 (this year, April 18) when the IRS comes a calling.

All of these prophesies have one thing in common. They play upon people's fears. Fear of the unknown. Fear of death. Fear of the future. Fear, as Franklin Roosevelt so aptly put it, of fear itself.

And there's one calendar yet to be mentioned here that strikes the most fear into the hearts of a certain segment of the population. An ensuing mass hysteria, to be sure.

The college application and admissions calendar.

Indeed, few things cause such upheaval in the lives of the college-bound (and their parents) as do those frightful dates on the calendar that portend the end of all life (not to mention reason) as they know it. ACT/SAT test dates. Application due dates. FAFSA/CSS Profile filing dates. Admission decision notification dates.

Dare we mention those intermediate days of stress and stammer, where the college calendar-watchers fret over the Common App, uncommon essays, AP scores, and extracurricular activities. Ahhh. Would that we only had to worry about an ensuing extraterrestrial invasion of Earth in 2012.

As if the college calendar was not fear-inducing enough, the true college "revelation" may yet unfold before the class of 2017, when declining acceptance rates in 2013 dwarf the dwindling admissions of 2012. Apocalypse deferred.

Yes, only the prepared will survive. The truly prepared, like those buying into the bunkers and stockpiles of survival gear on sale now for the great apocalypse of 2012, will thrive. [Okay. Those buying into the Mayan calendar myth will likely find themselves out big bucks come 2013 to the swindlers who made millions selling the myth to the masses. But we digress...]

Fear not the college calendar, my friends. Face your college future, head on. Do as the Mayans would have done, had they given thought to a perpetual Mayan calendar. Go digital?

No. Embrace the coming days, with awe and splendor. And as the college calendar ticks off the days toward that fateful time in 2013 when the mail (or e-mail) from your fav college arrives with news of your destiny, rejoice. [But please, don't drink the water...] This is not the end of the world. In fact, it is only the beginning!

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Plan. Prepare. Prevail!

The views and opinions expressed in this blog are solely those of The College Whisperer™, the authors of referenced articles and websites, and such guest bloggers as may appear.

Who knows what peril lurks in the college application and admissions process? The College Whisperer™ knows. . .

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